Snow day

It has snowed something like 5 inches so far and is supposed to snow more in the next few days without getting above freezing so exciting times here in Memphis. According to the news, the last time it snowed anywhere near this amount was back in 1988. I was 13 years old, probably in 8th grade. According to other sources, the last time was actually in 1985. My brothers remember walking to wrestling practice in the snow. D remembers walking over the lake on his grandparents’ property with his grandfather, who fell but it was when he wasn’t too old to fall without having to go to the hospital. The last time he fell like that was what sent him to the hospital for the last time.

Looking at the now fall out the window, I thought of my dad. I bet he would’ve enjoyed watching it fall. I bet he would’ve remembered when he was a kid in Wisconsin. He used to tell me that he would get up before dawn to feed the cows and then walk to school and by the time he got to school, his pants legs were frozen so after he’d been sitting in the warm classroom for awhile, the ice would melt making it look like he’d had an accident. It was one of those sob stories old people to tell young people to show how much more difficult life used to be. I always knew he was exaggerating but I still think it worked on me. I mean, he was in a one classroom school. And it was a probable enough story to be true. But it was still funny. I would fake sympathy and we would laugh.

I didn’t ever really talk to him on a regular basis but I do still miss him now that he’s gone and I CAN’T talk to him. Well, I can talk to him but he can’t talk back and I can’t see him. He always made me nervous, even up until the end. I guess at the very end I was more comfortable than I’d ever been but I was still always nervous a little bit. That doesn’t matter though. I think it’s okay. I consider it a healthy amount of respect. I wish Lily was the tiniest bit scared of me lol.

I’m glad I have this wonderful picture of the two of us on my desk now. I took a selfie just a few days before he died. His eyes looked so peaceful and I had so much love for him in that moment. After I showed him the picture, he asked me to clean his beard because he noticed coffee stains. He wasn’t used to having such a big beard and of course he didn’t want to look sloppy. Dirty he didn’t mind, probably, but he didn’t want to look sloppy. Ha. I was proud to wipe his beard for him. Those little acts of service for him at the very end felt so meaningful. Getting him water, rubbing lotion on his feet. I’m so grateful I got to show him my love and respect in those final days.

Anway, it snowed today and I bet he would’ve liked to see it. I really don’t remember ever seeing it come down the way it did today. We woke Lily up so she wouldn’t miss it and she went outside with us. We were so bundled up we could hardly move but it was fun. We only stayed out for a few minutes but I just loved being out there, experiencing something so rare with my little family. Then later David and I bundled up again and walked to the liquor store. I’m making homemade vanilla extract and needed more vodka to finish the last three bottles. He wanted something to kill the boredom. It was hard work walking all that way in fresh snow that covered our boots! Our glasses kept getting fogged up by our masks but it was so fun. There were hardly any cars out and even fewer people but it was just like old times. Me and D doing something stupid just for the fun of it. I’m lucky to have had my dad and now to have my husband. I’ve always had good men in my life. I’ve never thought about it much but that’s not something to take for granted.